Make the MOST MESSED UP STORY EVAR (game)

SO basically, you write one sentence in continuation of another's sentence, and form a story, it can be as absurd as possible, but please try to have good grammar (I'm a grammar nazi), and make sure it connects. Don't go like:
1: Once upon there was a man named Mike.
2: Pie is good.
3: I love money.
But rather, go like:
1: There once was a guy who loved sesame.
2: That guy was named mike, he went on an adventure consisting of strange creatures.
3: And later, he was eaten by those strange creatures.
4: But he knew martial arts so he made a hole in the creature's stomach and escaped.

Story so far:
Once upon a time, there was a young teenager named Jenn. But she met with a car accident... And instead of the car hitting Jenn, Jenn obliterated the car with a Kamehamaha! But it was all a dream. Then there was a guy named plenty..... Plenty was a extremely buff man with a 9001-pack. Said the bartender, to which he added, "by the way, buy something or piss off; you've been flapping your gums for the past 15 minutes" But another girl in the girl named Sila said: "Geez, calm down, nothing to argue about here you old men." "Swiftly takes out magic wand, ready for Genesis 31" But then, a ludicrously large, ornamented, golden hammer, with the word BAN engraved on its head, was subsequently swung into the building and everyone inside was crushed. except for plenty, because hes a robot. The Bartender crawled out from the rubble, reached for an empty bottle of 2005 Pinot Noir, pointed it at Plenty, and shouted, "OI M8 U FINA GIT BOTLED CNT? I'LL WREK U M8, I SWARE ON ME MUM" Plenty, unable to support himself with his crumpled appendages, begins to power off; with his last ounces of energy, he reports the Bartender for profane language and harassment. His report meant nothing when the cult members arrived. The Bartender jumped next to Plenty, bottle in hand, to defend him; he knew the cult members all too well... then suddenly the cult members all got explosive diarrhea from some bad chicken Matt made the night before. And the chicken came to life and tried to make out with everyone And than Glamour came flying into the scene like a superman, spat on the floor, and pointed a Concerto at the cult leader. As she shot it out came a pokeball and she yelled "Mudkipz i chose you!" Funny enough, Mukipz pulls out another pokeball, yelling out "Marshtomp, I choose you!" Marshstomp pulls out a Royalsball, and tries to capture the buff Plenty crawling out of the debris. The ball smacks Plenty square in the head, causing severe damage to his skull and the nerves in his spine, making him lose control of his rectal muscles, which then causes his to shit violently; so violently he begins to rocket into the sky and gain speed until he eventually warps into the ninth dimension, never to be seen again. Mudkipz dodges everything that was ejected from Plenty's bottom, and orders Dialga to teleport Mudkipz to the ninth dimension, and begins her adventure with Plenty. When Mudkipz finds Plenty, Plenty says that they lost their shoe while being ejected like a rocket so now they have to retrace the trail of poop to find the missing shoe. But they suddenly realized that someone had summoned Snorlax, and he just finished his meal of poop, so now the shoe is no longer traceable. *Meanwhile, back in our dimension...* The Bartender stands awkwardly with the cultists and tries to break the silence, "Soooo... how bout that Manchester United, eh?" Plenty: "Things aren't looking too good for me". The bartender is drunk and wouldn't remember a thing the next day anyway. In fact the entire thing was likely a story made up in his drunken stupor- but not even he knew that. Then Plenty went home and swam in his pool of mesos ala Uncle Scrooge style. after his swim he was feeling so generous that he gave glamour 5k candies. The Bartender served up the cultists some fine red wines as he started to mop up Plenty's literal shitstorm. After he gave glamour candies, an anonymous ninja used brainwash on Plenty, and Plenty now believes that he hasn't had a drink yet at a bartender. The Bartender senses a disturbance with his sulfite-senses, which almost made him drop a bottle of 2007 Fort Ross Pinot Noir Reserve, "Someone... has not been served..." Plenty then decided he wanted a change of scenery so off into the woods he went on an adventure. After an hour of wandering, he stumbled onto a big grizzly bear. As the bear raised up on hind legs ready to strike, he jumped and startled awake. Everything had just been a crazy dream! Realizing it was 8pm, Plenty got out of bed and enjoyed himself a pint of Americone Dream from the freezer and proceeded to write up drafts for an upcoming guide. Then he woke up again realizing that it was a dream within a dream and he was really deep in the scary woods! But there he read a piece of parchment in ancient Egyptian language, it read "You are all within the stomach of the great beast Mudkipz". He, however, met the fabulous Marty in the beast's stomach, who helped him return to the normal world with his rainbow powers. When they returned to the real world a large dark figure emerged in front of them and roared "I am Matt supreme ruler of this world, who goes there?!". Plenty then replies: "I am the almighty Plenty with the 9001-pack, you dare question me?" Matt then smiled at plenty, and asked him if he would like to take a walk, he had a business proposal for him. Then suddenly the great wall of Royals came flying down and crashed Matt for no reason. After all the rubble matt stood up brushed off all the dust and said "lets go". Plenty begins to acknowledge Matt after surviving that unscathed, however, Matt prepares a nasty test for Plenty. As they walk, Matt secretly lets out small farts with every step he takes. What plenty doesent know that matt is magical and each fart sends out a love gas that makes plenty fall in love with him! And then Plenty wakes up and this was all a dream. Plenty then realizes that he has very messed up dreams so he decides to go see a witch doctor to see if she can help him. The witch, after careful investigator, concludes that Plenty's "Odd Dream" sickness is incurable. but then his assistant had an idea, he had an idea that his odd dream sickness isent really a sickness, it is something that can be cured! The witch then recited the magic words...OOH EEH OOH AH AAH TING TANG WALLA WALLA BING BANG. Suddenly plenty had remembered, remembered his true identity, he was really FABIO! and this must of been the cause of all his weird dreams! Plenty then claims that he has an allergy that covers any part of his masculine chest. In the split second that Plenty had made the claim, suddenly a Hyper Beam came through the thick jungle forest, and blasted Plenty to smithereens. Good thing the witch doctor was there, he resurrected plenty and made him invincible! A shadow quickly handed Plenty a glass of strength-fortifying wine that gave him the power to move mountains; "You're drink, sir" Plenty slaps it out of his hand and takes the entire bottle into the woods. The shadow was revealed to be The Bartender, who responded to Plenty's action with, "That boy just aint right" Then Plenty tries to move a mountain, but then he realized it was a Pokemon.

p.s. The story's actually not bad so far LOL

New Rule: NO DREAMS, resets are too annoying lol.

I'LL START OFFFFFFF:
Once upon a time, there was a young teenager named Jenn.

 

AHHHH my names jenn and im none of that!

Actually,she liked eating bigmacs and wine.

 

But she met with a car accident...

 

And instead of the car hitting Jenn, Jenn obliterated the car with a Kamehamaha!

 

DONT SAY THAT!

But it was all a dream. Then there was a guy named plenty.....

 

Plenty was a extremely buff man with a 9001-pack.

 

I'm liking this story already.

 

Said the bartender, to which he added, "by the way, buy something or piss off; you've been flapping your gums for the past 15 minutes"

 

But another girl in the girl named Sila said: "Geez, calm down, nothing to argue about here you old men." "Swiftly takes out magic wand, ready for Genesis 31"

 

But then, a ludicrously large, ornamented, golden hammer, with the word BAN engraved on its head, was subsequently swung into the building and everyone inside was crushed.

 

except for plenty, because hes a robot.

 

The Bartender crawled out from the rubble, reached for an empty bottle of 2005 Pinot Noir, pointed it at Plenty, and shouted, "OI M8 U FINA GIT BOTLED CNT? I'LL WREK U M8, I SWARE ON ME MUM"

 

Plenty, unable to support himself with his crumpled appendages, begins to power off; with his last ounces of energy, he reports the Bartender for profane language and harassment.

 

His report meant nothing when the cult members arrived.

 

The Bartender jumped next to Plenty, bottle in hand, to defend him; he knew the cult members all too well...

 

then suddenly the cult members all got explosive diarrhea from some bad chicken Matt made the night before.

 

And the chicken came to life and tried to make out with everyone

 

And than Glamour came flying into the scene like a superman, spat on the floor, and pointed a Concerto at the cult leader.

 

As she shot it out came a pokeball and she yelled "Mudkipz i chose you!"

 

Funny enough, Mukipz pulls out another pokeball, yelling out "Marshtomp, I choose you!"